Have We Changed Over Time?

Since 911 we're still livin'
And lovin' life we've been given
Ain't nothing gonna take that away from us
Were lookin' pretty and gritty 'cause in the city we trust
Dear New York I know a lot has changed
2 towers down but you're still in the game
Home to many rejecting know one
Accepting peoples of all places, wherever they're from 

From "An Open Letter To NYC" by the Beastie Boys

Yes, I stayed up last night (11:34 p.m. EST) to watch our President Barack Hussein Obama deliver the news that we've been waiting for for over ten years, Osama bin Laden is dead.  (As a side note, let me just say how ironic it was that the last ten minutes of Donald Trump's show, The Apprentice, was cut off for this important event.  In recognition of the recent media matches between the Donald and his criticism of our President I thought it was just desserts.  Now, I must point out that I enjoy watching the arrogant, son of a bitch (Trump) and have even read one of his books -not exactly an intellectual stretch - but I did enjoy the fact that our President got the last word.  But, I still don't know who got kicked off The Apprentice last night,...oh, well).

As I wrote in previous posts, I lost friends and co-workers in 9/11.  The event changed my life.  For many years, I dealt with what I would call, PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).  At the time, I was working at night cleaning offices, by myself, and would envision my friend Bob looking down at me from above saying something like, "What the hell are you doing?", or "What happened to you?", or even, "How the hell did you let your life get like this?".  I even had a colorful dream in which Bob took me by the hand and led me through a place, similar to Chinatown in its colorful silks and celebratory pageantry, and assured me that everything was cool on the other side.  I always thought that of anyone, Bob, would be one of the few people I knew who would have the balls and sense of dignity to be one of the souls to have jumped to their death.  I've never had this detail confirmed but I am almost convinced of it as morbid as it sounds.  He was just a realist and knew his fate anyway.  Why burn to death when you can fly? 

I had immense feelings of guilt when I found out that a former co-worker, Laura, lost her life in 9/11.  We weren't close but we had similar backgrounds, respect from our peers, and accelerating career paths.  At one time, we were competing for the same job.  I got the job.  When I found out she was one of the victims of 9/11, I felt guilty that I somehow took that opportunity away from her.  I was equally emotionally distraught to find out that she left behind two young sons.  Ironically, I am a mother of two boys as well.  I still can't imagine how tough their lives have been without their mother.  In a way I feel a bit of survivor's remorse.  How is it that I am so blessed to have had the life of a mother and the opportunity to raise two boys while Laura, and her boys, lost out on this experience?!  It is so easy to feel guilty when there is no rhyme or reason for how life happens.

Um, I've never told anyone these things until now.

So, it took ten years to catch the bastard?  It should have been done sooner, goddamn GW and his stupid, dumb ass.  But, at least President Obama was lucky enough to be in power when this task was accomplished by his team.  And, unfortunately, there will be the right-wing Republicans belittling this accomplishment and even give credit to his predecessor.  Stupid asses.  That's the kind of shit that really burns me up, yanks my chain.

The difference between GW and President Obama, for me, is a mile wide.  It comes down to many things but, for me, I can listen to President Obama speak for hours.  He is intelligent, engaging, humorous when needed, and trustworthy.  He has repaired relationships with so many that GW alienated and pissed off.  When GW interrupted television programming I dreaded what he would say, how he would say it, and I was embarrassed by his ineptitude.

President Barack Hussein Obama has changed history, more than once.  I am proud of our President.  I am proud to be American.